My experience at IHOP-KC (Day 1)

I signed up for a weekend at the International House of Prayer - Kansas City so that I could spend my fall break with the Lord. I made this decision in mid-September before the bluegrass festival, making myself hang on until late October so I could be recharged. I also happened to find inexpensive accommodation for the weekend at a bed and breakfast for only $30 a night. The Lord planned the whole weekend out! He even prepared me through my own sermons for all of it.

I packed really light for this trip and took only the essentials knowing I'd rather spend time with the Lord and people. I stopped by in Baldwin City to see my college roommate and had a quick dinner with her before heading to the bed & breakfast. I arrived at around 8:00 pm. There was another guest in the B&B, Stephanie.

We started chatting and getting to know each other, and she felt that we should start praying. It didn't take a long time for the Holy Spirit to start taking care of things for me. When she started praying for me, things began to be revealed. I never mentioned how big my struggle was with depression. She saw that it was very deep, dark depression and suicidal thoughts were there too. We reached a block and something wouldn't break. That was just a symptom of a greater problem - perfectionism, which in itself was a symptom of the root cause. When the root cause was revealed, the floodgates wouldn't be held back any longer. There were things that happened in the past which caused me to be so trapped. Needless to say, there was a lot of crying that evening. The host of B&B, Bonnie also came and joined us in prayer. She asked me to envision Jesus being with me during those times when I really felt abandoned.

I remembered the Lord asking me whether I needed a hug from Him to make me feel better. I definitely needed lots of hugs and rocking that evening. I was very glad for the prayers and for the huge weight to be lifted away from my body. It was time to deal with the issues that keep me bound. After that, we went to the Prayer Room and spent a little time soaking in the presence of the Lord. It had been a long time since I felt His love and comfort.

I had a fitful night sleeping as I knew a huge battle was being fought for my freedom. The process of emotional healing is very painful itself and very exhausting to the physical body. I did wake up in time for my actual registered weekend at IHOP to begin.